Hudson County Rape Crisis Center of New Jersey

Welcome to the HCRCC Website!

2020-10-04T13:07:00.000-04:00

Greetings from the Hudson County Rape Crisis Center of New Jersey!
Please use the navigation menu on the right hand side to access resources and more information about our organization.

The Hudson County Rape Crisis Center assists survivors of sexual assault, ages 12 and above in Hudson County. The HCRCC provides free and confidential services such as a 24 hour crisis hotline; 24 hour accompaniments to hospitals, courts, and law enforcement agencies; individual counseling for survivors and their significant others; group counseling for survivors and their significant others; recruitment and training of Rape Care Advocates who provide accompaniments to survivors; and community education on issues pertaining to sexual assault, such as awareness and risk reduction.

Residents of Hudson county live in the following areas:
Bayonne (city), Jersey City (city), Hoboken (city), Union City (city), West New York (town), Guttenberg (town), Secaucus (town), Kearny (town), Harrison (town), East Newark (borough), North Bergen (township), Weehawken (township)

New Rape Care Advocate Trainings at the Hudson County Rape Crisis Center!

2020-10-01T00:49:00.003-04:00

New Rape Care Advocate Trainings at the Hudson County Rape Crisis Center!

This five (5) week training is for those interested in becoming Rape Care Advocates for the Hudson County Rape Crisis Center. Some of the topics included in the 40 hour training series are the Basics of Sexual Assault, Child Abuse, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and How to Counsel Victims. Completion of your hours certifies you as a Rape Care Advocate for Hudson County. The learn more about the role of the Rape Care Advocate, please visit: http://hcrcc.blogspot.com/2007/08/rape-care-advocates.html

This group meets over the course of five Saturdays from 10 am to 6 pm at the Christ Hospital School of Nursing's Student Lounge (169 Palisade Ave. Jersey City, NJ 07306). Please note that the sessions vary per training season, so please check back, or inquire about the upcoming training session!

If you are interested in attending this training series, please reply with the information below either by email, Jsilvestre@christhospital.org or call/leave a message at 201 795 8375 x 5269 and schedule your pre-meeting right away!

Name
Phone number
Email
Mailing Address

We will promptly add you to the announcement list, and look forward to hearing from you!

Best,
Hanalei Ramos
http://hcrcc.blogspot.com/

Publications & Materials

2007-09-29T20:43:00.001-04:00

Coming Soon! :)

Newsletter archive

2007-09-29T20:41:00.001-04:00

Coming Soon! :)

Rape Care Advocates

2007-08-28T15:20:00.000-04:00

The Rape Care Advocate is the first-responder when a victim is sexually assaulted.

Process of becoming a Rape Care Advocate:

At any point, email the following information to hramos (at) christhospital (dot) org or call/leave a message at 201 795 8375 x 5269 ) :

Name
Phone number
Mailing Address
Email
Schedule an in-person pre-meeting with the HCRCC Program Director up to ONE WEEK PRIOR to training start date.
Attend the free 40 hour training series.
Trainings are typically held in the fall and spring.
Upon completion of training series, certification to become a Rape Care Advocate in Hudson County is awarded to you at a completion ceremony.

Criteria for Volunteer Rape Care Advocate Applicants Prospective Rape Care Advocates must meet the following criteria to be considered for volunteer Advocate Training.

Must be 18 years of age or older.
Must have access to dependable transportation.
Must be able to fulfill the 40 hours committment required to complete the Advocate Training as well as monthly on-call shifts and meetings.
Must commit to 30 hours on a monthly basis to maintain Rape Care Advocate position.
The 30 hours are typically broken up into five 6 hour shifts, and based on each volunteer's availability.
Proven ability to deal with confidential information.
Demonstrate non-prejudicial attitudes towards victims, victimizations and a sensitivity to victim's needs.
Must be able to work with a minimum of supervision, but possess an ability to accept direction and guidance.
Provide appriopriate responses to volunteer interview questions.
Endorsement of agency philosophy regarding sexual assault.
Ability to relate to persons of all races, age groups, lifestyles, and socio-economic backgrounds.

Role of the Rape Care Advocate:

Focus on the victim
Promote victim healing through counseling and emotional support.
Ensure the victim is informed regarding all processess, options and resources.
Protect the victim's integrity and ensure the victim is treated respectfully and compassionately and that all options are being accorded her

Responsibilities of the Rape Care Advocate:

Believe the victim
Be non-judgmental
Recognize the sexual assault victim's unique needs and concerns
provide emotional support throughout ENTIRE healing process
Offer infortmaion regarding all available services, procedures, and options
Explain the importance of seeking medical attention
Explain the value of immediate evidence collection and early police reporting
CAution against the loss of evidence
Facilitate communication with law enforcement and medical professionals
Act as the victim's eyes and ears at a time when the victim may be too overwhlemed to retain all the infortmation of all procedures and processes
Provide a safe, neutral and confidential outlet to explore and weigh options
Allow and encourage the victim to take control
Support the victim's decisions and choice of options
Help the victim to process and uinderstand her feelings about the assault
Explain typical reactions and steps in the healing process
Develop a safety plan and methods for achieving normalcy in the aftermath of the assault
Provide referrals, victim's rights information and victim compensation information
Assist with impact statements

Rape Care Advocates DO NOT:

tell the victim what to do
Speak on behalf of the victim or disclose victim information without the victim's written consent
Assist with evidence collection procedures or handling of evidence
Make police reports
Transport the victim

Domestic Violence

2007-08-27T15:10:00.001-04:00

Signs of domestic violence:

unexplained injuries
someone stalking, monitoring and/or following her
repeated phone calls andor disruptive visits to the workplace
absenteeism
unexplained changes in performance

What you SHOULD say to someone who you suspect is being battered:
"I care about you and I'm sad this is happening to you."
"You don't deserve to be abused."
"The violence will get worse."
"I am afraid for your safety."

You should:

Emphasize that you are concerned. let the victim know you are supportive and that she is not responsible for what is happening to her -- reassure her that it isn't her fault.

Emphasize that when the victim is ready, there are a number of options available to help her. Allow her to make the decision that she needs help. Do not try to diagnose or treat the problem yourself, but you can offer to help h er, including making contact with referral agencies.

Demonstrate that you respect her decision if she decides to stay with her partner, even though you may not agree with it. Some victims leave and return to their partners several times. let her know that you support her no matter what and that going back does not mean failure.

What you SHOULD NOT say to someone who you suspect is being battered:

"If someone hit me once, I would leave. I don't know why you don't just leave him!"

You don't know the reasons why she stays with her paretner. Her reality is probably very different than yours. leaving a partner can be a very difficult process and often is a dangerous process for victims of domestic violence. In most cases, the most dangerous time for a victim is right after she leaves.

Also:

Don't dismiss her fears of him as if she is overreacting.

Don't try to instill shame in her for making the decision to stay or return to the abusive relationship.

Don't tell her she is a battered woman - let her tell you.

Let the victim decide what to do and what is best for her. She knows her own situation best. Do not put yourself in physical jeaopardy to help. You cannot help anyone if you are hurt.

Your Rights in a Relationship

2007-08-27T14:45:00.001-04:00

You have the right to:

not be abused physically, emotionally, or sexually
"fall out of love" with someone and live without threats
express your own opinions
make your needs as important to yourself as your partner's needs
grow as an individual in your own way and not be criticized for it
accept responsibility for your own behavior and no one else's
change your mind
have friends of your own
say "no"
be respected, loved, and live a peaceful life

Date / Acquaintance Rape and Dating Violence

2007-08-27T14:11:00.004-04:00

Myths About Dating Relationships:

A guy needs to be in control of the relationship.
A girl is to blamewhen the guy hits her.
It's understandable to hit her; maybe next time she;ll learn not to make me angry.
I love him. I'm the only one who can help him.
Some girls ask for it; that's why they stay.
I shoulnd't have nagged him. it was my fault he got angry.
When a guy gets angry he can't help it. He's uncontrollable.
I was drunk. I didn't know what I was doing.
She hit ne first and I hit her back,. everybody does it sometimes.
If she really loved him, she could make him change.
If I could figure out what sets him off and not do it, maybe he could stop.

All of the above statements are excuses.

Are you abusive?

Do you constantly check up on your partner and accuse her or him of being with other people?
Are you extremely jealous or possessive?
Have you hit, kicked, shoved, or thrown things at your partner?
Do you constantly insult or criticize your partner?
Do you become violent when you drink or use drugs?
have you threatened your partner or broken things in your partner's presence?
have you forced your partner to have sex with you or intimidated your partner so that he or she is afraid to say no?
Have you threatened to hurt yourself if your partner breaks up with you?

If you agreed to one or more of those questions, you are inflicting physical, emotional, verbal, and/or sexual abuse on your partner. As an abuser:

You must take responsibility for your actions.
you can't blame your behavior on your partner or drugs or alcohol.
you can change the way you act if you get supportive counseling.
you can call a crisis hotline for the number of a batterer's program or go to the counseling center at your school.
unless you do something about it, it's going to get worse, and your violence will increase.
you might be breaking the law with your abusive behavior.

Are you being abused?

Are you afraid of your partner's temper?
Are you afraid to disagree with your aprtner?
Are you constantly apologizing for your partner's behavior, espectially when he or she has treated YOU badly?
Do y ou have to justify every place you go, everything you do, or every person you see just to avoid your partner's anger?
Does your partner constantly put you down and then tell you that he or she loves you?
have you ever been hit, kicked, shoved, or had things thrown at you
Do you not see family or friends or do things just because of your partner's jealousy?
have you been forced into having sex when you didn't what to?
Are you afraid to break up because your partner has threatened to hurt you or himself/nerself?

If you agreed with one or more of those questions, you are in an abusive relationship. You can:

end the relationship and choose not to see your partner.
get help from someone you trust.
go to your counseling center.
review Your Rights in a Relationship
Call 800 572 SAFE (7233) for a referral to a local support program in your area

Sexual Harassment

2007-08-27T14:11:00.003-04:00

What is Sexual Harassment?

Sexual comments or gestures that are unwanted and uninvited.
You have the right to tell someone to stop his or her action(s) when it is making you feel uncomfortable or threatened.
If you are sexually harassed, contact the hudson County Rape Crisis Center for options and support.

Sexual Harassment can take the form of:

touching or grabbing
being the target of sexual rumors
sexual comments about your body
being brushed up against in a sexual way
commentsa bout your gender
sexual remarks or suggestions
behaviors that you do not like or want
conversations that are too personal
pornographic pictures or stories (and people not meeting your requests to put those items away.)
unwelcomed whistles, gestures, or noises
dirty jokes
obscene gestures
verbal disrespect
offensive displays of sex-related objects
staring in a way that is too personal
"mooning" and "flashing"

How can sexual harassment affect you? Feelings and thoughts associated with the event:

confusion
guilt
helplessness
anger
fright
hopelessness
loneliness / isolation

Reactions:

not wanting to go to work/ school
not wanting to speak to others
finding it difficult to study/focus
thinking about leaving/transferring/quitting jobs
self-sabotaging
sleep disturbance
eating disorders

What to do if you are being harassed:

TAKE ACTION!
tell the harasser to stop
talk to someone who you think would understand your difficulty
report the offensive behavior to a teacher, counselor, supervisor.

If the harassment continues you can:

write a letter to the harasser asking them to stop and telling them what behaviors are offensive to you.
keep a journal of thoughts and feelings.
document how you tried to stop it, what happened, when and where it ocurred, and who saw it.
Follow your school's sexual harassment policy and procedures.

What can I do if I witness someone else being sexually harassed?

say that you don't think that it's amusing.
tell the person to stop harassing.
don't do or say tanything that will encourage the harasser.

Stalking

2007-08-27T14:11:00.001-04:00

Protect Your Privacy While Using the Internet

2007-08-27T12:22:00.000-04:00

Protect Your Privacy While Using the Internet

Whenever you visit a web site on the Internet, you leave traces on your computer's hard disk that make it possible for someone to find out exactly where you have been. To protect yourself when accessing online resources such as this website, you should use a computer at your local library, or even at a friend's house. If neither of those options is available to you, here are instructions for deleting your web browser's cache, history and cookie files.

Please scroll down below for instructions for the following operating systems and browsers:
Windows 95/98/2000/XP
Microsoft Internet Explorer versions 5 and newer
Netscape Navigator versions 5 and newer

Macintosh OS 9.x
Microsoft Internet Explorer versions 5 and newer
Netscape Navigator versions 6 and newer

Macintosh OS X
Microsoft Internet Explorer versions 5 and newer
Netscape Navigator versions 6 and newer

WINDOWS 95/98/2000/XP

For Internet Explorer 5 and above, follow these directions to delete your Temporary Files, Cookies and History:

Open Internet Explorer and click "Tools" in the menu bar
Select "Internet Options"
At the "General" tab, locate the "Temporary Internet Files" section in the middle of the window
Click the "Delete Files" button, and when prompted, select "Delete all offline content"
Click "OK"
Now click "Delete Cookies," and then "OK" at the prompt
While at the "General" tab, locate the "History" section at the bottom of the window
Click the "Clear History" button, and when prompted, select "Yes"
Click "OK" to close the "Internet Options" window

For Netscape Navigator 5 and above, follow these directions to clear your History, Cookies and Cache:

Open Netscape Navigator and click "Edit" in the menu bar
Select "Preferences"
At the "Preferences" window, click "History" in the left-hand menu (under the Navigator" heading)
On the right-hand side of the window, click both the "Clear History" and "Clear Location Bar" buttons
Next, click the arrow next to the "Privacy & Security" heading in the left-hand menu to expose the sub-menu
Click "Cookies" in the sub-menu list, and then click the "Manage Stored Cookies" button (on the right-hand side of the window)
When prompted, click the "Remove all Cookies" button
Click "Close" to exit the "Cookie Manager" window
Finally, click the arrow next to the "Advanced" heading in the left-hand menu to expose the sub-menu
Click "Cache" in the sub-menu list, and then click the "Clear Cache" button
Click "OK" to close the "Preferences" window

Mac OS 9.x

For Internet Explorer 5 and above, follow these directions to delete your History, Cache and Cookies:

Open Internet Explorer and click "Edit" in the menu bar
Select "Preferences"
At the "Preferences" window, click "Advanced" in the left-hand menu list (under "Web Browser")
First click the "Clear History" button, and then click the "Empty Now" button (just below) to clear your cache
Next, click "Cookies" in the left-hand menu list (under "Receiving Files")
In the "Cookie Settings" area, locate the name(s) of the sites you wish to erase, and click the "Delete" button
Click "OK" to close the "Preferences" window

For Netscape Navigator 6 and above, follow these directions to clear your History, Cookies and Cache:

Open Netscape Navigator and click "Edit" in the menu bar
Select "Preferences"
At the "Preferences" window, click "History" in the left-hand menu (under the "Navigator" heading)
On the right-hand side of the window, click both the "Clear History" and "Clear Location Bar" buttons
Next, click the arrow next to the "Privacy & Security" heading in the left-hand menu to expose the sub-menu
Click "Cookies" in the sub-menu list, and then click the "Manage Stored Cookies" button (on the right-hand side of the window)
When prompted, click the "Remove all Cookies" button
Click "Close" to exit the "Cookie Manager" window
Finally, click the arrow next to the "Advanced" heading in the left-hand menu to expose the sub-menu
Click "Cache" in the sub-menu list, and then click the "Clear Memory" and "Clear Disk
Cache" buttons
Click "OK" to close the "Preferences" window

Mac OS X

For Internet Explorer 5 and above, follow these directions to delete your History, Cache and Cookies:

Open Internet Explorer and click "Internet Explorer" in the menu bar
Select "Preferences"
At the "Preferences" window, click "Advanced" in the left-hand menu list (under "Web Browser")
First click the "Clear History" button, and then click the "Empty Now" button (just below) to clear your cache
Next, click "Cookies" in the left-hand menu list (under "Receiving Files")
In the "Cookie Settings" area, locate the name(s) of the sites you wish to erase, and click the "Delete" button
Click "OK" to close the "Preferences" window

For Netscape Navigator 6 and above, follow these directions to clear your History, Cookies and Cache:

Open Netscape Navigator and click "Edit" in the menu bar
Select "Preferences"
At the "Preferences" window, click "History" in the left-hand menu (under the "Navigator" heading)
On the right-hand side of the window, click both the "Clear History" and "Clear Location Bar" buttons
Next, click the arrow next to the "Privacy & Security" heading in the left-hand menu to expose the sub-menu
Click "Cookies" in the sub-menu list, and then click the "Manage Stored Cookies" button (on the right-hand side of the window)
When prompted, click the "Remove all Cookies" button
Click "Close" to exit the "Cookie Manager" window
Finally, click the arrow next to the "Advanced" heading in the left-hand menu to expose the sub-menu
Click "Cache" in the sub-menu list, and then click the "Clear Cache" button
Click "OK" to close the "Preferences" window

The Basics of Sexual Assault

2007-08-27T11:34:00.001-04:00

A violent crime can happen to anyone.

Other important information:

Sexual Harassment

Date/Acquaintance Rape and Dating Violence

Stalking

Your rights in a relationship

Domestic Violence

What is Sexual Assault?
It is any sexual contact that is unwanted or forced without consent. This includes:

Touching someone in intimate areas on top of or underneath clothes
being forced to touch someone in intimate areas
unwanted vaginal, oral, or anal penetration by any object (no matter how slight)
Consensual sex witha victim who is mentally disabled or under the age of 16
Sex witha victim who is drunk while the offender is sober.

Who are the victims?

FBI statistics indicate that both males and females of all ages, races, and ssocioeconomic status have been victims of sexual assault.

Who are the offenders?

More frequently than not, offenders are usally someone the victims knows.
Very Few are strangers.
Most often, the offender is someone the victim trusts (ie. marital partner, dating partner, friend, acquaintance, family member, team coaches, religious officials, coworkers, etc.)
Relatives are usually the offenders of children who are sexually assaulted.
Offenders are both male and female.
Offenders are selfish and insecure and are motivated by a desire to gain power and control, or to degrade their victim.

**How to ensure your safety and the safety of others:

Trust your instincts.
If someone is indecisive, silent, or does not say "yes" to sex, avoid the risk of committing a crime.
If someone says "no" and/or becomes motionless during sex, be respectful and do not proceed.
Know how intimate you want to be with someone, and verbalize what you want.
use a buddy system when you go out.
Educate yourself around rape prevention tactics.
Never leave your drink unattended. You can be drugged without your knowledge, or made vulnerable by your intake of drugs and/or alcohol.
Stay alert.
The best resistance you can use against your offender is NOT TO PANIC.

**It is important to know that it is not the victim's fault if they are asaulted and have not followed these safety tips. no one expects to be sexaully assaulted. The blame lies with the offender for taking advantage of the victim, Unfortunately, victims are still sexually assaulted, despite follwoing safety tips.

Common Myths About Sexual Assault:

Rape/ Sexual assault is an "uncontrollable" sexual urge.
False, many sexual assualts are planned, and have more to do with asserting control over another person, rather than sex.

Rape/Sexual assault is an act of pure lust.
False. The motivation behind sexual assault is the desire to overpower, control, degrade, and humiliate another person.

Rape/Sexual assault happens because the victim's dress or behavior triggers the assault.
False. The perpetrator/offender's deciscions and attitudes are the ONLY causes of the sexual assault.

Rape/Sexual assault happens because th victim deserves it.
False. It is NEVER the victim's fault.

Rape/Sexual assault cannot occur between married or dating couples.
False. Almost 80% of sexual assaults are committed by marital partners (marital rape), dating partners, family memebrs, acquaintances, or other people the victim knows and trusts.

Programs and Services at HCRCC

2007-08-09T12:43:00.006-04:00

All services at the Hudson County Rape Crisis center are confidential and free of charge to all Hudson County Residents.

Community Outreach and Presentations
If you would like us to give an educational presentation on sexual assault to a community agency, professional group, school, or college, please contact us at 201 795 8375 x 5269, or email Jessica: Jsilvestre (at) christhospital (dot) org.

Counseling

Hotline
201 795 5757
For survivors, their families, and friends. Assured confidentiality. Available 24 hours every day.

Information and Referrals

Rape Care Advocacy Volunteers
All of our rape care advocates have had extensive training in how to help victims of sexual assault. Please click this to learn more about the role of the Rape Care Advocate. If you are interested in becoming a volunteer rape care advocate, please contact us at 201 795 8375 x 5269, or email Jessica: Jsilvestre (at) christhospital (dot) org.

Services

Rape Care... We Care...

179 Palisade Ave., Jersey City, NJ 07306

Have you been a victim of sexual assualt? If so, please know that you are not alone. Sexual assault occurs in one of of four women and one out of ten men. At the Hudson County Rape Crisis Center, we wish to provide on-goin counseling to victims of sexual assault. Currently we ae recruiting members to join our group entileled Rape Care... We Care..., designed so that victims of sexual assault may begin the process of healing within a safe environment. This will be a 6 week cycle. The meetings will be held at the Counseling and Resource Center at Christ Hospital, located at 179 Palisade Avenue, Jersey City, NJ 07306. SNACKS WILL BE PROVIDED. If you are interested, please contact Connie Bryant (201) 795- 5816. Let the healing Begin!

The Adulecent Group (ages 13- 17) meets every Tuesday from 4pm- 6pm.
The Adult Group (18 and up) meets every Monday from 5pm- 7pm.

Act It Out

(Coming Soon)

“Act It Out” is community-based SOCIODRAMA program. AIO will focus on providing the educational tools necessary in preventing sexual assaults and harassment in Hudson County. It will consist of high school and college level student volunteers who will be performing socio-dramas in an effort to deal with sexual assault, acquaintance rape, date rape drugs, sexual harassment, and dating violence. It is our intent that through education we can have a positive and direct effect on the community, and those involved will go on to educate others in the community.

About / Contact HCRCC

2007-08-09T12:39:00.004-04:00

24 Hour Hotline: 201 795 5757

The Hudson County Rape Crisis Center assists survivors of sexual assault, ages 12 and above in Hudson County. The HCRCC provides free and confidential services such as a 24 hour crisis hotline; 24 hour accompaniments to hospitals, courts, and law enforcement agencies; individual counseling for survivors and their significant others; group counseling for survivors and their significant others; recruitment and training of Rape Care Advocates who provide accompaniments to survivors; and community education on issues pertaining to sexual assault and prevention.

Hudson County Rape Crisis Center
Christ Hospital Dept. of Psychiatry & Behavioral Health
179 Palisade Avenue
Jersey City, NJ 07306
Office: 201 795 8375
Fax: 201 795 8381

Sailume Walo, Coordinator
swalo (at) c hristhospital (dot) org

Connie Bryant, VAWA Clinician
cbryant (at) c hristhospital (dot) org

Jessica Silvestre, Community Outreach Educator
jsilvestre (at) c hristhospital (dot) org

Sheila Wilson, Community Outreach Educator
swilson (at) c hristhospital (dot) org

Resources

2007-08-09T12:39:00.001-04:00

Online Directory to Services

IF YOU ARE IN AN EMERGENCY SITUATION, PLEASE CALL THE LOCAL POLICE BY DIALING 911

National Resources:
Domestic Violence Hotline
800 572 SAFE

Women's Referral Central 1-800-322-8092

Hudson County and Other NJ Specific Resources:

Listing of All New Jersey Rape Crisis Centers
http://www.njcasa.org/centers.htm
Bayonne Mental Health Center
201 339 9200

Bergen County Rape Crisis Center
201 487 2227

Christ Hospital Counseling and Resource Center
201 795 8200
201 795 8375

Division on Civil Rights
609 292 4605

Division on Women
(Office on the Prevention of Violence Againsdt Women)
609 292 8840

Essex County Rape Crisis Center
973 972 1325

Hudson County Prosecutor's Office
201 795 6400

Hudson County Sex Crime Unit/Rape Cases
201-451-728

Hoboken Family Planning
(201) 963-0300

Hudson County Rape Crisis Center
201 795 5757

Hudson County Victim Witness Program
201 795 6508

Jersey City Medical Center
201 915 2000

Mobile Crisis Unit
201 915 2210

New Jersey Child Abuse Reporting
800 792 8610

New Jersey Coalition Against Sexual Assault (NJCASA)
609 631 4450
908 418 1354

New Jersey Domestic Violence
800 572 7233

NJ Violent Crimes Compensation Board
800 242 0804

Palisades Counseling Center
201 854 0500

Saint Mary's Behavioral Health
201 792 8200

Sexual Assault Victims Assistance (S.A.V.A) Police Unit
201 915 1234

State Office of Victim-Witness Advocacy
609 984 3880

Steven's Institute of Technology
http://www.stevens.edu/womensresources/sexual_assault.htm
Stevens Health Center: x5678
Stevens Counseling Center: x5177

Union County Rape Crisis Center
908 233 7273

Women's Shelter: (YWCA) 24-hour Battered Women hotline
201-333-5700

How to Support Victims and Survivors

2007-08-09T12:37:00.000-04:00

How do I help someone I care who has been sexually harassed or assaulted?

Listen to them patiently. Believe them.
Listen without judging - give him or her plenty of time to talk.
Encourage them to call the Rape Crisis Hotline to learn more about their available options.
Do not revictimize the survivor; listening comes before discussing solutions.
Continue to be his/her friend while expressing your concern for his/her safety.
Understand that some comments about the offender may very well be mixed messages; he or she will express both good and bad feelings.
Supply him or her with referrals to local agencies that help victims of sexual assault.
Educate yourself about the issue.
Volunteer to become a Rape Care Advocate

Sometimes, it is difficult to focus on your loved when you have strong emotions about the incident. You may feel guilty for not protecting the victim, or wonder if the victom could have prevented the harrassment/assault. Reassure the victim and yourself that the offender is to blame for the harrassment or assault.

The aftermath of sexual harrasment/assualt often disrupts the close bond you have with a loved one. As a result, you become a secondary victim of the crime. it is not uncommon to be frustrated, impatient, and to want revenge against the offender. However, this can bring more grief for both the victim and you.

Contact our hotline to assist you with your struggles. You may find that facing your own thoughts and feelings will help you gain a better understanding of the situation and promote healing in botht he victim and yourself.

10 Things Men Can Do to End Violence Against Women
By Anthony Porter and Ted Bunch

1) Understand and acknowledge the role male privilege and socialization play in sexual assault, domestic violence, and all forms of violence against women.

2) Examine and challenge our own sexism and the role we play in supporting men's violence against women.

3) Stop being a part of this violence by agreeing that this mistreatment is alright, this only supports the abuse of the perpetrator. Get out of defined roles in society, take a stance, and stop being passive.

4) Remember that our silence is affirming. When we choose not to speak out, we are supporting the behavior.

5) Educate and re-educate our sons and other young men about our responsibility in ending violence against women.

6) Challenge our homophobia, which has been designed to get in the way of ending violence against women, and stops us from actively getting involved in this struggle --- labelling violence against women a "women's issue," not one we should all be a part of.

7) Accept our responsibility, violence against women will not end until men become part of the solution to end it. While a criminal justice response to sexual assault and domestic violence is necessary, a cultural and social shift is required.

8) Stop pathologzing men's violence. Blaming addictions, mental illness, anger management, stress, etc... they are not the reason nor cause. violence against women is a man's choice, rooted in and supported by sexism.

9) Do not support resources being utilized to divert our attention from the efforts needed to create appropriate and effective systems of accountability.

10) Accept leadership from women. Violence against women will end only when we take direction from those who understand it most, women.

For Victims and Survivors

2007-08-09T12:36:00.000-04:00

If you are sexually assaulted:

Get to a safe place where you are no longer in harm.
Understand that no one had the right to hurt you, regardless of how you dress or behave.
Call the 24-hour Hudson County Rape Crisis Hotline if you would like an advocate to meet you at the hospital.
A rape care advocate will listen without blaming you. He or she will offer you information, options, and support your choices.
Seek medical attention for possible injuries, to prevent sexually transmitted diseases, and to chekc for pregnancy. if you are considering pressing criminal charges, medical staff will utilize a "rape kit" to collect forensic evidence. Evidence is best collected within 72 hours of the assault.
If possible DO NOT shower, bathe, douche, eat, drink, urinate, or change clothing, as crime evidence may be destroyed.
At your request, a rape care advocate will accompany you during all medical and legal processes.
Consider notifyingt he police.
Consider getting counselling right away. Research indicates that rape victims who get therapy right after their assault are less likely to develop symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). The Hudson COunty Rape Crisis Center offers free confidential individual and group counseling.

Rights of sexual assault victims:

To be assured confidentiality.
To have free choice about decisions affecting their life.
To be told what legal and medical options are available.
To be made aware and receive medical and counseling services whether or not a crime is reported to the police.
Under New Jersey Law 52:4B-22, a victim should be told of their right to have a rape care advocate BEFORE
Giving a statement to the police and BEFORE
Undergoing medical treatment unless emergency medical attention is required. This allows a victim to choose if they want a trained advocate to assist them during some, or all, of the proceedings.
Victims are entitled to receive medical services and counseling even if the crime is not reported to the police.
Victims have the right to be treated with respect by all officals responding to their assault, and to be treated without prejudice regarding race, class, age, gender, sexual orientation, occupation, dress, or a lifestyle involving the use of drugs and/or alcohol.

How does sexual assault affect a victim's life?

Some victims of sexual asasult fought their offender and up battered, bruised, or wounded. Some have died in the struggle. Most victims are too shocked or frightened to fight back.

While many show no outward physical signs of the attack, some suffer with serious internal injuries and long-lasting psychological difficulties. Victims endure a range of painful emotions such as anxiety, humilitation, anger, guilt, and depression.

Often, victims are concerned about how others will react to the assault. they fear that no one will believe them or that everyone will balme them. They may be more withdrawn,a nd appetite or sleeping habits may change.

It is important for victims to talk about their feelings with someone they trust, such as a friend, family memeber, or better yet, a trained professional.

Breaking the silence of sexual assault can be the most important key to recovery.

The process of taking legal action:

There are two options to consider when one deiceds to take legal action:

Victims can talk to the police and pursue criminal charges,
and/or a victim can hire an attorney and sue the offender in civil court

Civil cases can be costly, but if the victim wins, the offender pays the victim a sum of money for damages caused by the assault. For more information regarding civil suits, contact a lawyer who practices tort law and request a free consultation.

Pressing criminal charges is the most common legal action victims take. This process begins when a victim gives arecorded statement to the police. It is important for the victim to discuss ALL details pertaining to the sexual assualt so :

the police have direction in collecting evidence
the prosecutor can assess the degree of the offense and file charges accordingly.

Once police investigate and believe that a crime has been committed, the offender is arrested and put in jail. Trials are often avoided because the offenders admit guilt, or thye accept a prosecutor's plea bargains and plea to a lesser crime for a lower sentence. Many court dates follow the offener's arrest if the offender please not guilty.

Victims do not have to attend most of these procedures. On rare occassions, victims are asked to testify at Grand Jury to establish that the case meets the criteria for trial. Victims may also be asked to be present when prosecutors select a jury for trial. Since the victim is the primary witness in sexual assault cases, victims may expect to testify. If the idea of testifying in court is intimidating, talk to a prosecutor and see what options are available. It helps some victims to know that a great deal of support is offered during this time. Prosecutors prepare victims to know what to expect in the courtroom, and rape care advocates will accompany victims during all legal proceedings to offer strength and encouragement.

For more information about court procedures in criminal sexual assault cases, contact the Hudson County Prosecutor's Office at 201 795 6400 .

Hudson County Victim Witness program

This program keeps victims informed via mail about legal process in their case and notifies when their offender gets out of jail. This service also offers compensations for losses resulting from crimes(s), and may assist in expense accrued as a result of being a crime victim. victims must press criminal charges to be eligible, and fill out an application within days of the crime. For more informations regarding this program, please contact the Hudson County Victim Witness Unit 201 795 6508 .

How Hudson County Rape Crisis Center can help you

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24 Hour Hotline: 201 795 5757

Our confidential 24-hour hotline is available every day to individulas ages 12 and over.
Both male and female victims have called to discuss past and recent sexual abuse, assaults, and/or harassment.
our serivces are available to victim's family memebrs, marital/dating partners, and friends to assist them in understanding their own reaction to the assault and how to helop the victim.
We have been called upon by professionals in the community, such as therapists from mental health agencies, legal personnel from prosecutor's offices, and medical staff from hospitals to support victims through medical.legal accompaniments and crisis counseling.
Please feel free to contact us if you have any questions about our services at 201 795 8375 x 5269 .
All of our rape care advocates have had extensive training in how to help victims of sexual assault.
If you are interested in becoming a volunteer rape care advocate, or if you would like us to give an educational presentation on sexual assault to a community agency, school, or college, please contact us at 201 795 8375 x 5269.
All of our services are free to hudson County residents.